Sure Beats Work » television

I’ve never been prouder to be from RPV.

m@ — Thu, 29 Apr 2010 06:01:13 +0000

Thanks South Park!

Who wants to take a trip with me?

m@ — Fri, 21 Aug 2009 18:05:53 +0000

Someone was kind enough to send me a quaint little bed and breakfast place in Pennsylvania. We can learn how to juice beets and make tables. It’ll be so much fun.

Schrute Farms

South Park: Foundation of Our Relationship

m@ — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 20:19:29 +0000

When we first met Michelle thought I was doing “retarded voices” until she realized I was mimicking Cartman from South Park. I introduced her to the show and she loves it. We used to watch all the time and discuss what we’ve learned from the the episodes from the economy to race and religion.

Okay, so I have no talent…

m@ — Tue, 09 Jun 2009 15:36:05 +0000

I’m tired of being a nine to five worker. I want to be Hollywood. Okay, maybe not Hollywood, but I’d like to get paid for minimal work time and those kids on The Hills seems to have something working for them. But I don’t want to be a douche bag. Maybe I can get one of those gigs as a spokesperson for a major corporation?

Surely I could play one of these people and sell products to millions of viewers with one catch phrase that I utter over and over. If they say I don’t have the face for television, this will be my response.

Put the Jack head on! I’m going to work!

Flash on the Boob Tube

m@ — Tue, 21 Apr 2009 15:05:34 +0000

If you clicked to my website because of the title, you are going to be sorely disappointed. Well maybe you won’t be if you are a huge nerd. Ars Technica is running an article about Internet ready televisions getting access to an optimized Flash for HD content. Today is the day we start to ditch cable and make all data and media Internet based. If only we could get those assholes at the ISPs to stop looking at bandwidth caps and bandwidth throttling as a legitimate means to earn more money so we can deliver more content via means like this.

Sure I’ll Share. Except the Internet!

m@ — Sun, 18 Jan 2009 18:34:24 +0000

My parents are very generous people. Their successes in life are definitely due in part to their work ethic, but there is also an element of just being in the right place at the right time. For this they are very grateful and so they share their prosperity. Don’t get me wrong here. My parents are not sitting on piles of cash and diamonds, but the amount of money they put into charity would shame most of us. It’s probably more than a lot of us earn in a year.

I’d like to think they have rubbed off on me quite a bit in this area. Giving is in my nature. I don’t have a whole lot of money, but if I can give a couple hours of my time or the shirt off my back I would. Still, there are some places where a man must draw the line.

My parents watch a Korean television station for one particular drama, which I think takes place in feudal Korea. It’s funny because we’re not Korean and they rely solely on the English subtitles, about which my dad has said, ” I don’t really read those. I can get the gist of what’s going on with the tones.” At first it was all fine and dandy. I would give up the television as the hour approached. That’s what sharing is about, but now it’s been taken too far.

Both my parents have found the show streaming online. My Internet usage comes to a crawl when their marathon viewing sessions take place. They don’t even watch together on the same computer. They will sit in different rooms watching the show, using twice as much bandwidth. Do you know how hard it is to pirate new albums before they hit the shelves or full length feature films before their theater release when you have two computers streaming video on your network? Just kidding RIAA and MPAA.

Everyone has had a shower where there just isn’t enough water pressure. This is just like that, only slightly more serious. My files are stuck to me, not able to be rinsed away. It’s beginning to sting in my eyes. I’m not crying! I have soap in my eyes!

I could rewrite the firewall rules so they can’t connect to the site at the same time, or maybe this is my cue to check into Internet rehab.

Maximizing the Weekend

m@ — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 04:39:09 +0000

I’ve heard it time and time again. Where did the weekend go? There are just so many things that suck up time during the oh so valuable weekend. Fortunately, preparing meals will no longer get in the way of my busy weekend schedule of watching full seasons of The Office. My TiVo will take care of my nutritional sustinence provisions. Now if only I could get my PS3 to answer the door and my Wii to tip the delivery guy.

Ooh! Wooooh! Ooh!

m@ — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 17:29:10 +0000

Recently I have come into possession of the DuckTales series. This has to be one of the greatest cartoon series ever produced as far as character and plot development go. Disney was really on a roll when The Disney Afternoon came out with DuckTales, followed by TaleSpin, and finally Darkwing Duck.

Michelle thinks Alvin and the Chipmunks holds a candle to DuckTales. That’s just ridiculous. Talking chipmunk rock stars…give me a break. Richest duck in the world with giant money bin that he swims through…that makes perfect sense to me.

Who Stole My Stolen Cable?

m@ — Tue, 19 Feb 2008 22:02:22 +0000

In the past two weeks I have been without most of my precious cable channels. I can only assume that someone working on the cable noticed that we were getting more channels than we receive a bill for every month. Rather than try to fix it and risk getting in trouble, I will leave it. We will close escrow in a week, and I will have to get used to paying for digital cable anyway.

Why I Love the Japanese

m@ — Wed, 30 Jan 2008 17:16:51 +0000

Japan is known for its outrageous television, from game shows, to practical joke shows, to just ridiculous, nonsensical shows. They all make us laugh.

It’s awesome see contestant after contestant run full speed into an obstacle course even though slowing down would work much better. One after another they dash in with reckless abandon, despite being rather dangerous. On top of that, no one is free from the wild times, from women and children to old people, probably with heart conditions. No one seems to get angry though. It’s a way of life there, a better life.

All those links are safe for work, except this one that is partially NSFW. I wonder if the girls get to keep the money. That wouldn’t be a bad days work if they were quarters, even better if they were silver dollars. Sign me up to be the coin collector!