I’m tired of being a nine to five worker. I want to be Hollywood. Okay, maybe not Hollywood, but I’d like to get paid for minimal work time and those kids on The Hills seems to have something working for them. But I don’t want to be a douche bag. Maybe I can get one of those gigs as a spokesperson for a major corporation?




Surely I could play one of these people and sell products to millions of viewers with one catch phrase that I utter over and over. If they say I don’t have the face for television, this will be my response.

Put the Jack head on! I’m going to work!

Hello, there. My name is Matt, but on this website I just refer to myself as m@. I love all things Star Wars, food, beer, and music, especially The Beatles. I'm one who likes to be noticed and will sometimes say or do inappropriate things to get your attention. I'm perfectly complimented by my online and real life partner